Keeexin!
Keeexin,Crystal
♥Whisky&Brandy Are loved by me :) !
lovekexin@live.com
Keeexin!
Keeexin,Crystal
♥Whisky&Brandy Are loved by me :) !
lovekexin@live.com
Chatterbox
♥Sherlyn
-SHYBOYDr. Quek made a routine house call to Mr. Lim, one of his elderly
patients.
He asks, And how are you doing today, Mr. Lim?
Mr. Lim replies, I feel just fine, doc. But you know, its the
strangest thing. Every night when I get up to pang jio, the bathroom
light goes on for me automatically when I open the door! The doctor is
worried that the old man is getting senile, so he phones the mans son,
and the sons wife answers.
The doctor tells her, Mrs. Lim, Im a little concerned about your
father-in-law. It seems that when he gets up to urinate at night and
opens the bathroom door, the light somehow goes on...
At which point, Mrs. Lim yells, Ah Seng! Ah Pa pang jio in the fridge
again!
*********************************************************************
Dr. Quek made a routine house call to Mr. Lim, one of his elderly
patients.
He asks, And how are you doing today, Mr. Lim?
Mr. Lim replies, I feel just fine, doc. But you know, its the
strangest thing. Every night when I get up to pang jio, the bathroom
light goes on for me automatically when I open the door! The doctor is
worried that the old man is getting senile, so he phones the mans son,
and the sons wife answers.
The doctor tells her, Mrs. Lim, Im a little concerned about your
father-in-law. It seems that when he gets up to urinate at night and
opens the bathroom door, the light somehow goes on...
At which point, Mrs. Lim yells, Ah Seng! Ah Pa pang jio in the fridge
again!
*********************************************************************
QUESTION: How do you know frogs are Hokkien?
ANSWER : Because when its cold, they go kwah,kwah,kwah.
QUESTION : How do Hokkien prawns laugh?
ANSWER: Hae hae hae (hokkien for prawns)
QUESTION: How do Hokkien fish laugh?
ANSWER : Hee hee hee (hokkien for fish)
QUESTION : Whats the difference between ang-mor and Hokkien fairy
Tales?
ANSWER: Ang-mor fairy tales begin with Once upon a time... and
Hokkien
fairy tales begin with Lim Peh ka li kong...
___________________________________________________________________________
At a Senior Citizen's luncheon, an elderly gentleman and an elderly lady struck up a conversation and discovered that they both loved to fish.
Since both of them were widowed, they decided to go fishing together the next day. The gentleman picked the lady up, and they headed to the river to his fishing boat and started out on their adventure.
They were riding down the river when there was a fork in the river, and the gentleman asked the lady,
"Do you want to go up or down?"
All of a sudden the lady stripped off her shirt and pants and made mad passionate love to the man right there in the boat When they finished, the man couldn't believe what had just happened, but he had just experienced the best sex that he'd had in years.
They fished for a while and continued on down the river, when soon they came upon another fork in the river.
He again asked the lady, "Up or down?”
There she went again, stripped off her clothes, and made wild passionate love to him again.
This really impressed the elderly gentleman, so he asked her to go fishing again the next day.
She said yes and there they were the next day, riding in the boat when they came upon the fork in river, and the elderly gentleman asked, "Up or down?”
The woman replied, "Down."
A little puzzled and disappointed, the gentleman guided the boat down the river when he came upon another fork in the river and he asked the lady, “Up or down?”
She replied, "Up."
This really confused the gentleman so he asked, "What's the deal? Yesterday, every time I asked you if you wanted to go up or down you made mad passionate love to me. Now today, nothing!"
She replied, "Well, yesterday I wasn't wearing my hearing aid and I thought the choices were fuck or drown."
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
Sam : "It's a family tradition".
Teacher : "What do you mean?"
Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher".
Teacher : "What about your mother?"
Sam : "She's a woman".
_________________________________________________________________________________
MAN : You remind me of the sea.
WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
MAN : NO, because you make me sick .
________________________________________________________________________________
GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...
____________________________________________________________________________
Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time."
____________________________________________________________________________________
Teacher : " George Washington no! T only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.
Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand."
____________________________________________________________________________________
When you join a company, you... KAM LAN
When someone tries to boss around, he's a... SIA LAN
When there's favoritism in your company, you... TU LAN
When your hard work was not appreciated, you... LAN LAN
When all your hard work has gone into the drain, it's.. LUM PAH PAH LAN
That chee hong working in your company, he's a... LAU LAN
When you can't be bothered, you... BOH HEW LAN
When you don't understand the other party, you ask... KONG SI MI LAN?
That guy who tries to be funny with you, he's a... KWAI LAN
When you've got angry customers... ORH LAN
The company which you work in... NEOW CHEE NEOW LAN
When you've decided to quit, you wonder... CHO SI MI LAN
And you're out of ta job & don't know what to do, you... CHO BOH LAN
When you strike a lottery but are then investigated by the IRAS because of it, it's really... KIO TIO GU LAN
That woman who signed on as an Army regular... MULAN
_____________________________________________________________________________________
You have to read in full attention in order to understand-.- Dont know why i cant insert colour lol.. but nvm ;D
patients.
He asks, And how are you doing today, Mr. Lim?
Mr. Lim replies, I feel just fine, doc. But you know, its the
strangest thing. Every night when I get up to pang jio, the bathroom
light goes on for me automatically when I open the door! The doctor is
worried that the old man is getting senile, so he phones the mans son,
and the sons wife answers.
The doctor tells her, Mrs. Lim, Im a little concerned about your
father-in-law. It seems that when he gets up to urinate at night and
opens the bathroom door, the light somehow goes on...
At which point, Mrs. Lim yells, Ah Seng! Ah Pa pang jio in the fridge
again!
*********************************************************************
Dr. Quek made a routine house call to Mr. Lim, one of his elderly
patients.
He asks, And how are you doing today, Mr. Lim?
Mr. Lim replies, I feel just fine, doc. But you know, its the
strangest thing. Every night when I get up to pang jio, the bathroom
light goes on for me automatically when I open the door! The doctor is
worried that the old man is getting senile, so he phones the mans son,
and the sons wife answers.
The doctor tells her, Mrs. Lim, Im a little concerned about your
father-in-law. It seems that when he gets up to urinate at night and
opens the bathroom door, the light somehow goes on...
At which point, Mrs. Lim yells, Ah Seng! Ah Pa pang jio in the fridge
again!
*********************************************************************
QUESTION: How do you know frogs are Hokkien?
ANSWER : Because when its cold, they go kwah,kwah,kwah.
QUESTION : How do Hokkien prawns laugh?
ANSWER: Hae hae hae (hokkien for prawns)
QUESTION: How do Hokkien fish laugh?
ANSWER : Hee hee hee (hokkien for fish)
QUESTION : Whats the difference between ang-mor and Hokkien fairy
Tales?
ANSWER: Ang-mor fairy tales begin with Once upon a time... and
Hokkien
fairy tales begin with Lim Peh ka li kong...
___________________________________________________________________________
At a Senior Citizen's luncheon, an elderly gentleman and an elderly lady struck up a conversation and discovered that they both loved to fish.
Since both of them were widowed, they decided to go fishing together the next day. The gentleman picked the lady up, and they headed to the river to his fishing boat and started out on their adventure.
They were riding down the river when there was a fork in the river, and the gentleman asked the lady,
"Do you want to go up or down?"
All of a sudden the lady stripped off her shirt and pants and made mad passionate love to the man right there in the boat When they finished, the man couldn't believe what had just happened, but he had just experienced the best sex that he'd had in years.
They fished for a while and continued on down the river, when soon they came upon another fork in the river.
He again asked the lady, "Up or down?”
There she went again, stripped off her clothes, and made wild passionate love to him again.
This really impressed the elderly gentleman, so he asked her to go fishing again the next day.
She said yes and there they were the next day, riding in the boat when they came upon the fork in river, and the elderly gentleman asked, "Up or down?”
The woman replied, "Down."
A little puzzled and disappointed, the gentleman guided the boat down the river when he came upon another fork in the river and he asked the lady, “Up or down?”
She replied, "Up."
This really confused the gentleman so he asked, "What's the deal? Yesterday, every time I asked you if you wanted to go up or down you made mad passionate love to me. Now today, nothing!"
She replied, "Well, yesterday I wasn't wearing my hearing aid and I thought the choices were fuck or drown."
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
Sam : "It's a family tradition".
Teacher : "What do you mean?"
Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher".
Teacher : "What about your mother?"
Sam : "She's a woman".
_________________________________________________________________________________
MAN : You remind me of the sea.
WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
MAN : NO, because you make me sick .
________________________________________________________________________________
GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...
____________________________________________________________________________
Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time."
____________________________________________________________________________________
Teacher : " George Washington no! T only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.
Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand."
____________________________________________________________________________________
When you join a company, you... KAM LAN
When someone tries to boss around, he's a... SIA LAN
When there's favoritism in your company, you... TU LAN
When your hard work was not appreciated, you... LAN LAN
When all your hard work has gone into the drain, it's.. LUM PAH PAH LAN
That chee hong working in your company, he's a... LAU LAN
When you can't be bothered, you... BOH HEW LAN
When you don't understand the other party, you ask... KONG SI MI LAN?
That guy who tries to be funny with you, he's a... KWAI LAN
When you've got angry customers... ORH LAN
The company which you work in... NEOW CHEE NEOW LAN
When you've decided to quit, you wonder... CHO SI MI LAN
And you're out of ta job & don't know what to do, you... CHO BOH LAN
When you strike a lottery but are then investigated by the IRAS because of it, it's really... KIO TIO GU LAN
That woman who signed on as an Army regular... MULAN
_____________________________________________________________________________________
You have to read in full attention in order to understand-.- Dont know why i cant insert colour lol.. but nvm ;D